Priyanka Singh
BIO
Biologist, Assistant Professor, mom of one.
Twitter: @PS_lab
Priyanka Singh
“This expedition made me realize the importance of family in helping traverse the ups and downs of life.”
Being a woman in STEM has its own challenges and becoming a mother in addition makes it even more of an uphill task and exposes the prevailing presumptive mindset in academia. A friend, who had bid adieu to academia, once told me, “You will realize that your productivity in work will be affected after motherhood and you will have to set your priorities straight.” I had downplayed the statement assuming it as her personal experience and not necessarily a general assessment of mothers in STEM.
After becoming a mother myself, I understand the challenges that come with trying to juggle the personal and professional worlds. There are times when I find myself asking questions such as, why is it so difficult? Is it the same for men as well? I often found solace by reflecting back on my personal experiences that inspired me to understand and embrace this issue and move forward with a positive outlook.
The first person who has always been my greatest source of inspiration is my mother. She was born and brought up in the region of India, where higher education among girls is not a norm. None of those limitations stopped her from achieving post-graduation which eventually helped her to get a job as a teacher. However, challenges posed for a working woman in the 80’s meant that no sooner after the birth of my younger sister, she had to leave her job. Nevertheless, she paved the way for me and my sister to prioritize education and aim for excellence in life. Fortunately, my parents provided their support throughout my career which included my decision to go abroad for higher education despite this being an unpopular idea for a girl from an average middle class family. As a result, I did my PhD from the University of Muenster, Germany. Thereafter, I got some of the very competitive and highly prestigious fellowships like the EMBO-Long term fellowship and the Alexander von Humboldt (AvH) fellowship which allowed me to further pursue my research work at the Biozentrum, Switzerland and the Max Planck Institute of Molecular Physiology, Germany, respectively. Afterwards, I decided to return back to my homeland India as an Assistant Professor at the Indian Institute of Technology Jodhpur, where I currently work.
Fortunately, my husband also hails from an academic background. We share a friendly relationship with mutual admiration for each other’s professional space and standing. Last year, our life took a beautiful turn when we realized that we would soon become parents. Shortly thereafter, several of the pregnancy-related symptoms like shortness of breath, nausea, food aversion, swollen ankles, frequent urination and vomiting etc. all kicked-in. Suddenly, I found that some of the daily tasks in academia like sitting through long meetings, continuous talking in class, working for long hours on computers, impossible deadlines to meet etc. could cause distress and anxiety which isn’t the best combination for a healthy pregnancy. I made several conscious efforts to calm my nerves in such stressful situations like leaving from long meetings after a non-acceptable working time or saying plain “NO” to certain unreasonable expectations at work. Although I am guilty of being overly committed to my work on certain occasions, for instance, on the night of my delivery, I was working late in the office which I realize in hindsight wasn’t the best decision I made.
The baby was born a few weeks premature. Since the birth didn’t go fully as per the plan, I realized that I had to finish several work commitments before going on maternity leave. One of the very first things I did after leaving the hospital with my healthy boy was to appear for presenting my proposed work for one of the highly prestigious national level awards called the “Har Gobind Khorana-Innovative Young Biotechnologist Award (IYBA)”. It is actually astonishing that I was able to manage so much while being sleepless, exhausted and also continuously breastfeeding the baby. I am sure that any average person would probably give up while trying to juggle around so much. I felt as if something within me gave tremendous strength and confidence. This something pushed me to keep going for the sake of my career and as well as for the sake of my family. Perhaps, it is the very feeling of becoming a “mother” that means never give up.
Living on an academic campus, I was often tempted to meet my students to get research updates and involve in scientific discussions which are certain aspects of my job that I really enjoy. On the other hand, I also did not want to miss the opportunity of spending quality time with my baby during the maternity leave. This dilemma led me towards a sense of guilt of either not able to pay enough attention to my baby or to the work. At that stage, my parents and in-laws decided to take turns to stay with us and help with the baby. Their involvement helped me to get back on my feet and gradually I acquired more self-belief where work and personal life seemed manageable.
Meanwhile, I also found some life hacks; like, baby’s nap time is my research time, which allowed me to keep connected with the scientist in me. While still on maternity leave, I got the news of being a recipient of the IYBA award for which I gave an interview a few months back. It is a matter of great self-pride for me to receive such prestigious national-level recognition in such trying times. In retrospect, I felt that my productivity was in fact more during maternity leave as I not only accomplished a national-level award which brought along the fund required to pursue the research work but also simultaneously got a research paper published. These achievements would not have been possible without the support of my family, especially my husband. This expedition made me realize the importance of family in helping traverse the ups and downs of life.
As the maternity leave ended, we found ourselves in a pandemic that humans rarely see in their lifetime. This poses new challenges which any mother could not have imagined. Similar to millions of working mothers in the world, I often find myself feeling burnout with the new parenting responsibilities, household duties and the very concept of working from home. Nevertheless, this phase of life is overwhelming and the positive outlook towards life that I have imbibed from my personal experiences provides me with the hope that everything is just going to be alright.
In general, life can definitely get easier for many “scimoms” who find support both at work and home which I believe is often lacking and compels a woman to make the tough choice of prioritizing family over her career.
Several international institutes where I had previously worked are consciously indulging in discussions and trying to implement policies to make their academic environment more family-friendly. I hope such discussions and policies can also materialize at the scientific institutes across India.
Our society needs to learn that becoming a mother is a most natural part of life, and the working environment especially in academia, doesn’t need to be so challenging that it would cost the dream and career of a woman who also happens to be a mother.
Life has presented me with this opportunity of becoming a mother and taught me some of the most valuable lessons which I will always cherish. One thing is for sure that nothing matters to me more in the world than the purest and innocent toothless smile of my baby! Signing off! A #woman in science and a #scimom in #STEM